Child Sexual Abuse

 I am having trouble sleeping after following the recent sexual abuse claim  involving a minor. The case has been getting public attention as it happened in a maahad tahfiz owned by a celebrity ustaz and one of the perpetrators is the ustaz's son. The parents of the said victim have contacted the school but they were told that they shouldn't trust their own kid. Feeling helpless the parents contacted Wardina Safiyyah and Syed Azmi, both are very vocal about kids sexual abuse cases and through FB, the case went viral and people start paying attention. You can google if you want to know more about the case.

I am not here to take sides since the case is still under investigation. But reading the comments really break my heart. Why? 

1. The blame the victim game. Accusing them of slander and trying to tarnish the ustaz's name. Saying things like the kids have discipline problem, but even if it is true, will that justify the heinous crime made against the kids?
2. The netizens who are still saying things like the issue should be made silenced in the name of religion. Haven't they heard sexual abuse cases involving the church before? How is this different? 
3. Those who are sharing their sexual abuse stories and how it affected their lives even when they are all grown-ups.

We need to educate the kids. They need to know how they can prevent it from happening. What we can do is:

1. Talk to them about their body parts and make them identify their private parts. Tell them that only you (mom/dad) can see them naked. People outside the house can never see them naked except the doctor and even then, mommy and daddy need to be there with them.
2. Teach them that no one can touch their private parts. Tell them also that they can't touch people's private parts.
3. Explain to them that they should run, scream and quickly inform other grown-ups if they feel that they have been violated.
4. Tell them that they will never be in trouble if they share anything with you because most perpetrators will use threats and secret-keeping to ensure the kids keep quiet about the abuse.

As parents, we need to listen to our kids and we need to be aware of any changes with our children, no matter how small they are.

Why I don't do flat lay?

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Credit: Pinterest

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Don't get me wrong. I love great flat lay pics. I'll go ooohhs and aaahhs most of the time I see them. But flat lay seems to despise me. You see there are several key elements in producing a great flat lay shots and  here is why I suck big time.

1. Lighting

Flat lay is all about getting that soft, natural light. So I guess the best time to take the pics is early in the morning or in the middle of the day. Morning? Pfffttt... Good luck with the kids ever so excited telling me to hurry up or they'll be late for school. Or is it the other way around?

2. Backdrop

So you need to have a really simple backdrop that brings the attention to your products. So we are talking about wooden tabletop, white surfaces, nice tiles or fluffy rugs here. My biggest problem is to find a CLEAN one for that matter.

3. Organization

Flat lay means you need to plan ahead of time how you are going to place all the items so they all look effortlessly put together. It'll look crowded if you put them too close. You seriously don't want to overdo it. Nor would you want to look as if you are not putting enough effort at all. The balancing part is really putting me off. I'm having trouble to balance my life already.

Credit: snobfashionblog

4. Content

Should I do flat lays on my outfits? Oh yeah, people, you need to see my worn black flats (but they are the comfiest I promise), my blue jeans or baggy slacks (depending on which one I see first), my blue sling bag (so my two hands are free in case my kids need some extra care), my crumpled tudung (they are most of the time the instant one, where you don't need to belit-belit...haishh so effortless kan) or my shirt/tunic dress/jubah (only the one that is crease free and no need to iron maa).

Hmm what about that nice fluffy roti telur that I ate this morning at mamak. Maybe I should flat lay that together with the creamy teh tarik, perfectly served on the bright orange table. Talk about some nice colour palette. Nah.... When I see food, I just devour them straight away.

But I'm not giving up without a try. So here is my best attempt at flat lay after considering all of the above. But I add convenience as the fifth key element as you can see below.

I saw the mess on the kids' table and decided to take advantage out of it.  Would normally push them all in a box, but hey let me do a flat lay instead. Lighting- Yup, it is a bit off. I've opened all the windows, in my defense. Backdrop-white table ticked. Organization- I'm not going to rearrange them and question my kids imagination. It's a war zone down there. Content- My everyday battle.

Now you know why I don't do flat lays.